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Dec 11

Tulsa Divorce Lawyer Offers Insight on Joint Child Custody

Tulsa Divorce Lawyer

Oklahoma Family Lawyers, sitting from left to right, James R. Elder, Aaron D. Bundy, M. Shane Henry, Luke Barteaux and Robert G “Hap” Fry Jr.

As time marches on, more and more parents and experts are recognizing the value of shared parenting between divorced couples. The Tulsa family law firm of Fry & Elder is well aware of the rising trend that is joint child custody, which is why we are here to offer a few tips on how to have a successful joint custody relationship with your ex.  Simply put: joint custody is something that can be very beneficial to all parties involved, but it also takes work, as any great Tulsa Divorce Lawyer will tell you.

Be realistic

While you might have the best intentions in mind, all too often a common problem during custody disputes is for one or both parents to ask for too much custodial time. This usually coincides with the fact that parents want to get as much time as possible with their child out of fear that there is a chance that they might be losing them. The truth of the matter is that  quality always trumps quantity when it comes to spending time with your child. The last thing you want to do is overextend yourself so far that you don’t have the necessary energy that your child deserves.

Watch your tongue

It should go without saying that if you really are going to try and make joint custody work with your ex then you absolutely need to make it a priority not to talk badly about your ex. Be prepared for trouble and potential conflicts down the road should you choose to badmouth your ex in front of your child. Your child loves the other parent just like he or she loves you. With that in mind, it is best to keep any negative thoughts to yourself.

Cut your ex some slack

Even though your former spouse may have cheated on you, been emotionally distant or done something else undesirable, it is important for you to remember that they still have the best intentions for your and their child. While your marriage might not have worked out, there still is a good chance that your parenting arrangement can still succeed.

As with anything, there stands a chance that the joint child custody agreement might not work out. If you think this is the case, we encourage you to call the family law firm of Fry & Elder today to set up a personal consultation with an established and experienced Tulsa Divorce Lawyer and take the necessary first step to get your problems resolved.

 

Post in: Blog, Family Law, Fry & Elder Blog, Fry & Elder News, Tulsa Divorce Lawyer

Dec 9

Tulsa Divorce Attorneys Offer Advice to Divorcees

Tulsa Divorce Attorneys

Fry & Elder is your Oklahoma Family Law Firm

There is no way to sugar coat it. Going through a divorce is a difficult and tough experience for most everyone that goes through one. There not only is emotional and financial stress involved throughout the process, social pressure and anxiety can also surface, particularly when you begin telling friends and family member about your divorce. With committed and experienced Tulsa divorce attorneys, the Tulsa family law firm of Fry & Elder is well versed on the stress that goes along with divorce and child custody issues, which is why we want to offer a few insightful tips on how to answer questions about your divorce.

Combat the temptation to gossip

There is no doubt that it is good to vent, particularly to close friends and family, but you would be wise to watch your tone around others. It absolutely is in your best interests to avoid talking trash about your ex or going too deep into the details of your divorce. People love to gossip, and these kinds of things can easily become the topic of conversation from within your social circle. Our advice to you is to be careful and to tread lightly.

You are entitled to privacy

Some of us out there are not too keen on sharing personal matters, even with relatives and close friends. While they may have the best intentions by asking you questions about your divorce, sometimes bringing up painful memories can keep one from moving on. If this is indeed the case, then you absolutely have the right to stay quiet. In fact, there is nothing wrong with proceeding in that manner. You choice of keeping the particulars of your divorce quiet and to yourself are something that others will have to learn to deal and something that you do not have to compromise on.

What do you say then?

If you do find yourself being bombarded with questions about your divorce, you may not want to go into specific details, but you also don’t want to come off or appear rude. You best bet to get through this is to come up with simple, vague but genuine response. This might mean saying something like: “It’s been difficult, but each day I’m getting better.” To shift the focus off you, you might want to then ask them a question about how things are going for them.

We know that divorce can be hard, but hopefully these tips will give you game plan on how to deal with things when it becomes a topic of conversations. Should you need any other advice on managing your divorce or child custody matters, contact family law firm of Fry & Elder today to set up a personal consultation with proven and experienced Tulsa divorce attorneys.

Post in: Blog, Family Law, Fry & Elder Blog, Fry & Elder News, Tulsa Divorce Lawyer

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